Cycling vs. Running

    It's been two full years now since I put my bikes away and started running. Last year I began two races but bailed in the middle. I just wasn't feeling it. This year was the first year since 2000 that I didn't do a single bike race. The last two years have been taken up with running ultra-marathons. This seems to bother some people.
    Just to lay some background info, while living in Nashville, TN, I bought my first adult bike when I was 27years old. just some crappy mountain bike for $60 from a friend and it changed my life. All of a sudden my world got more manageable. Even though I was mainly using it to meet people I was selling drugs too, I looked forward to every one of those little trips. Right away I started commuting to work and it didn't take long before I was taking longer and longer trips away from my house. I still hadn't given over to any sort of "bike culture" though. There really wasn't any at the time in Nashville, TN other than overweight doctors and lawyers on overpriced bikes.
    A couple months after moving to Atlanta, GA I bought my first "real" bike. A Bianchi mountain bike. That bike became almost everything to me. As I hadn't made many connections after moving there and was kind of confused as to why I had even ended up there in the first place, I spent most of my days off riding around and exploring the city. Accidentally exploring my soul as well.
    I moved there somewhat fresh out of rehab and was trying to stay sober, so the bike was a good form of therapy. Although not a good enough form. It didn't take long before I was back to my old lifestyle but the bike was there to stay. It really had to be. It was my only form of transportation. As it turned out, it was a lot of people's only form of transportation. It seemed like everywhere I went there was at least one other freaky looking guy on his way somewhere on a bike.
    After some "real life shit" and getting sober, I managed to work myself into a gig as a bike messenger. This was almost a dream come true. It helped me sty sober, I met a lot of interesting people, reinforced a work ethic, lost weight and cured my insomnia. I made more money than I had EVER made before and I pretty much spent my day living inside of a video game.
    I started doing some courier races and from there started racing mountain bikes. I did 24 hour relay races and 12 hour solo races. Where you go to a trail and do as many loops as you can within that 12 (or 24) hour period. I had no idea about training or anything. I just rode as much as I could and then would go race.
    Moving to Portland, OR would change that. After several years as a bike messenger I wanted to ride for me. No more 10 hour work days, rain or shine with 20-60 lbs of deliveries in my bag.
    I found some cool endurance mountain bike races. Some 50 milers, a couple of 12 hour races but it really only left me with about three or four races a year. Plus, some of those races were really expensive, about $250. Most courses were also a pretty good distance from Portland, as well. Just out of the necessity to race a reasonable distance from home, it led me to road and cyclocross. Not quite as enlightening as riding a mountain bike 12-24 hours in the middle of the cascades but it made up in other areas. Racing road bikes actually led me to an interest in european history, specifically France, Italy and Spain. And even though I had made a living as a pizza cook for several years, it took racing a bike and learning about Europe to foster an interest in food and it's connection to earth, body and community. I owe a lot of who I am today to cycling.
    After some more "life changes," I had to put my bikes away for a bit. It all kind of stacked up. I moved to a small studio apartment and seven bikes wouldn't fit so most of them went in storage. There was some friction with my team and I wasn't really up for dealing with it at the time. And it was winter, not the most motivating time to ride in Portland, Oregon.
    As my "new life" started to settle a bit and the weather started to clear, I started running in the park about a mile from my house. Miles and miles of singletrack buried in a forest of doug firs, evergreens, moss and big-ass "land of the lost" ferns. EXACLY what I needed. I would head into these woods about three times during the week to knock out a half-marathon and usually a 20 miler on the weekend. I needed this time to think and I needed this time to "not-think."
    I had ran a bit over the last few years but always put it aside once the weather cleared up enough to train on the bike. I'd done a couple marathons and a 50k but I still had some unrealized goals. Mainly a 50 miler. Maybe this would be the year to focus on that.
    The farther I got away from cycling, the less it seemed to have to offer me. It could be a really expensive interest, which was an issue at the time. It had also become an "arms race" that I had become a part of. It's hard to not notice when the the guys you're racing against (in 40+ CAT 4) are on $5,000 bikes and I'm on a $1,300 bike (Although I could drop almost everyone of them at the slightest of an incline). And most of the conversations in group rides seemed to center around the newest gear and training. BORIIIING. As far as training is concerned.....hill repeats, intervals and long miles. That's it. THAT'S IT. Nothing else to say on the matter. Even that was bullshit. When it comes to training (cycling or running), lots of miles, lots of hills. THAT'S it. It had gotten so far away from where I had started and why it was so important to me. The only way to deal with it was to walk away.
    This wasn't easy. Cyclists (to their credit) don't like to see this. I was hit up on almost a daily basis about when I would be riding again. Usually multiple times a day. Some of it seemed almost angry. I mean, it wasn't like I was sitting on my ass eating potato chips instead. I was out running my ass off. This seems to anger cyclists even more. Cyclists hate running.
    Although I missed my Sunday morning group rides (they wouldn't be the same anyway. that was over) I was getting much more from my ultras I was "competing" in. Much more enlightening. You run 35-50 miles in the desert or mountains and you don't usually come back the same person as when you started. And the change is ALWAYS a positive. No fights at the finish line about "holding your line."
    I may get back on the bike again one day, who knows? Who cares? But I won't pick up where I left off. What's the point? And while I acknowledge the journeys that first $60 bike led me on, at this point I'm on a quest to go farther and higher....albeit a little slower.